Well, this is a sorry sight, for sure. Don't mind the typewriter over here nudging one of those pieces of...well, you with one of his boots. Really, people needed to take better care of themselves- even though he himself had an adventurous streak doesn't mean he would do things that would lead him to getting broken and impossible to use for a while.

"And what sad state of affairs led to this, I wonder? Ran into one of the dragons and called him names?